ambition

if i had to rate the most important qualities in a person - no, in a life - i think ambition would be in my top five... no, top three. i respect people who work hard. who, for whatever reason, take their profession seriously. they come in early, stay late, they go above and beyond to do what needs to be done.
but sometimes ambition can bite you in the ass.
for four years, i've given my life to marion county high school. i've sponsored clubs, coached teams, chaired committees, and taken on the role of advanced placement teacher with a last minute's notice. i've attended ballgames, dances, and conventions with my students in order to make that "personal relationship" a positive one. i've given my life to them -- and just a few weeks ago, they took my life from me. they took away the reason i teach here, the reason i've stayed through the boring, lonely years of living in lebanon. i've spent some of my best years in lebanon, with no real friends, no sushi restuarants, no coffee bars, none of the things that make me, me. and i did it for the job. but the job doesn't seem worth it anymore.
ambition also has me dating someone i rarely see. someone i fight with only because he's so far away and our relationship exists over the telephone.
ambition brings us together but it pulls us apart.
in the end, is ambition that important? or should the person who blows off work to spend the day... doing... nothing... the one i should be respecting? after all, i bet they're happy...and one of my favorite quotes, from e.e. cummings, states, "the most wasted of all days is the one without laughter."